Leave me a message. My phone will not let me delete messages without listening to them. Fortunately, my phone does not know the difference between me listening to a message and when I just put the phone down and have my desk listen to a message. Thanks desk. So sure, my desk would really appreciate your explanation for why you missed class. Go ahead, let the long saga of your various time conflicts unfold into my phone. My desk will love it. My desk will eat your story up. While in defiance of all known natural laws, I suspect that if I keep doing this an ugly stain will eventually develop on my desk. A dark amorphous stain comprised of laughable excuses delivered at odd times to ensure the likelihood of reaching voicemail. If I’m lucky this stain will resemble the Virgin Mary and I’ll sell it on Ebay.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Go Ahead
Leave me a message. My phone will not let me delete messages without listening to them. Fortunately, my phone does not know the difference between me listening to a message and when I just put the phone down and have my desk listen to a message. Thanks desk. So sure, my desk would really appreciate your explanation for why you missed class. Go ahead, let the long saga of your various time conflicts unfold into my phone. My desk will love it. My desk will eat your story up. While in defiance of all known natural laws, I suspect that if I keep doing this an ugly stain will eventually develop on my desk. A dark amorphous stain comprised of laughable excuses delivered at odd times to ensure the likelihood of reaching voicemail. If I’m lucky this stain will resemble the Virgin Mary and I’ll sell it on Ebay.
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Ha! I bet your desk and my desk would have a blast comparing stories over inks! (Get it? drinks but for desks? Ok, maybe I shouldn't comment on blogs before finishing my second coffee...)
ReplyDeleteNice one, Dr. Students really do think they're centrally important to their professors/tutors and that they can charm their way into an award high distinction - especially with an earnest and soppy phone message! It's sad, but all part of hoops, I tell you. It's those bloody hoops again.
ReplyDeletePlease add some more words into my comment as and when. I am presenting at a conference tomorrow and am getting socked in the face by adrenaline.
ReplyDeleteLove, love, love the photo for this posting: it's perfect!
ReplyDeleteAnd I've been known to literally leave my office and get a cup a coffee while those messages are playing.....
And why is it that the lame students leave all of those messages for our desks, and then a really dedicated student will disappear for a week or so with NO message, and then show up again, and MAYBE mention, "Oh, I was in the hospital with [insert major ailment here], but I didn't want to bother you. I figure it wasn't your problem."
ReplyDeleteI had a student who ripped a piece of paper from MY notebook on top of my desk and left a note letting my desk know that my office hours do not work with her schedule and she listed times that work for her. She's a hall-of-famer.
ReplyDeleteMy office phone has no voice mail - or answering machine. At first I thought that this was odd, then I realized that my department is genius! Given I am only in my office during office-hours (more or less), students will just have the phone ring and ring forever.
ReplyDeleteLove it. I have prerecorded a message on my non-office (adjuncts don't have offices, just imaginary workspaces with phones that answer and record) that says "Don't leave a message, as I never check them. Email me instead. I check that bi-weekly." It never fails to nip the lengthy wails and excuses in the rose's ass.
ReplyDelete