Friday, March 20, 2009

Meeting Season

Aaah time. Your passage is eternal. Based on common time reckoning equipment your passage is also very predictable. Seconds. Minutes. Hours. Days. Weeks. I could go on forever, literally. Fucking forever. Here‘s a few additional things I happen to know about time: Faculty meetings start at 12:15. At 12:20 your absence will be noticed. At 12:30 we will begin a conversation regarding your possible whereabouts. At 12:35 whoever has the unfortunate seat closest to the door will leave the meeting and bravely venture out in search of you. Our admirable sojourner will discover you in your office. Coincidentally, your office is next door to mine. I could easily give your door a knock as I join the migrating herd of faculty stampeding down the corridor on their way to the meeting hole. But I am tired of this. I can no longer protect you. Your timing is weak, you deserve to be isolated. I leave you victim to predatory students lurking in the hallways. Our resident graduate hyena pack is ready to pounce; they are just dying to know what our meeting is about and they get nervous when we congregate. You are the straggler, the obvious victim. This is your fate. The rest of us are already safely seated around the meeting hole, staring at the clock, waiting for time to pass.

In case you need them, be sure to request a copy of the meeting minutes here!

5 comments:

  1. Seems that 'tis the season, indeed.

    http://trainingprofessor.blogspot.com/2009/03/todays-faculty-meeting.html

    Misery loves company. We will never be alone.

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  2. HA! Click on that shit everybody.

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  3. I stared at the ear hair of the prof next to me at the meet today. But I have no idea what the dept will do about the air conditioning.

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  4. I examine shoes, also no idea what happened at meeting.

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  5. I doodled a flower and stars on my agenda at our meeting. I also started a poem. The person next to me graded a whole set of papers.

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