Thursday, July 29, 2010

Pod People

There’s a long list of things I don’t believe in. Decaffeinated coffee. Fairies. Ghosts. Gods. Edited volumes that are worth a shit. Angels. That Coke and Pepsi are equivalent. Vacuum cleaners that don’t lose suction. Reincarnation. Baggage fees. Jack & cokes. That Avatar was a good movie. The list goes on…

But I do believe that my ipod has magical powers. It does. Granted, all the music on my ipod is music I put there. I get that. But how does “random shuffle” know to pick the perfect tunes for a rainy intoxicated afternoon? How does it know that? How does it know that I need a post-writing music session? How does it know my type and degree of intoxication? How does it know the weather? I believe my ipod to be wise. Maybe I should sober up before the toaster starts talking to me. I gotta go. I have a strange and urgent need to make cinnamon toast.
Posted by Dr. No

13 comments:

  1. ArlennaJuly 29, 2010 at 1:58 PM

    Well maybe your ipod could come teach mine a lesson. Mine always gets stuck on the same set of songs that I constantly skip over and hardly ever plays certain ones that I really like.

    ReplyDelete
  2. BeccaJuly 29, 2010 at 2:05 PM

    I wish I were having a rainy, intoxicated afternoon.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dr. NoJuly 29, 2010 at 2:44 PM

    Dear Arlenna ipod,
    Buck up and start playing your owners favorite songs- you're being a douche.
    -Dr. No ipod

    Dr Becca & Comrade: There's still time!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJuly 29, 2010 at 2:51 PM

    Have your iPod talk to mine. I need good selections for a speed workout, in 15 min.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Good Enough WomanJuly 29, 2010 at 3:19 PM

    Coke? or Pepsi?

    (*raising one eyebrow and furrowing the other*)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Dr. NoJuly 29, 2010 at 3:56 PM

    Dear famusings ipod,
    It's time to ROCK OUT dude.
    -Dr. No ipod

    GEW: Coke damnit.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousJuly 29, 2010 at 7:23 PM

    Coke. tastes. like. ass.

    famusings, try some grunge. STP and Nirvana are my current speed workout go-tos.
    jc

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hypothetical EngineerJuly 30, 2010 at 1:43 PM

    My iPod does a pretty good job of picking music, except when I used my shuffle a lot. The autofill on that would stick some of the most random music. I once got an ipod full of almost nothing but opera. Wouldn't have been too bad but it was right before a trip to the gym.

    ReplyDelete
  9. InkJuly 31, 2010 at 9:56 AM

    COKE!

    (But also edited volumes...)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ms.PhDAugust 1, 2010 at 12:53 PM

    I think it's due to psychic powers. My iPod also seems to know my mood and what's going on in the world, and my life, in general.

    But I'm pretty sure it's the owner who projects these desires onto the iPod. The rest of you need to get to some meditation classes, stat.

    ReplyDelete
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