I will just to have to trust all of you to notify me immediately if you see me engaging in the following behaviors:1. I don a leather motorcycle jacket paired with a bathing suit and attempt to go waterskiing.
2. I hire a cute and adorable 6 year old guest blogger named Dr. Bowl-cut to join my posts.
3. I replace herkies with “the pike” and expect no one to notice.
4. I pick up Acadamnit and move it from Ivory Tower, University Town to Minneapolis under a highly dubious work-related guise.
5. I finally decide to have wild and passionate sex with my blog colleagues.
6. Popular Acadamnit characters, such as…uhm, monkeys, Deans and Reply-Allers, leave the blog in favor of more lucrative movie careers.
If I jump the shark in any of these conventional methods, an intervention will be required. While I no doubt have a shark to jump (coincidentally I saw fucking sharks on vacation- they were close, it was awesome), I will try to jump it gracefully. Preferably, I’ll make this jump with a cocktail in my hand a few good books under my belt, and stream of publications trailing behind me. We shall see.
If I jump the shark in any of these conventional methods, an intervention will be required. While I no doubt have a shark to jump (coincidentally I saw fucking sharks on vacation- they were close, it was awesome), I will try to jump it gracefully. Preferably, I’ll make this jump with a cocktail in my hand a few good books under my belt, and stream of publications trailing behind me. We shall see.
(Can you believe that fucking kitten poster? I almost pissed myself.)
Ok, we'll be on the lookout. Especially because "pike" is not as fun to say as "herky," nor does it have the same sense of giddyness. It's just all "hey, I'm a triangle."
ReplyDeleteNice kitty poster! ;)
That's the same kitten poster I have on my office wall. It gives me inspiration when I'm down and makes me think that if a ginormous kitten can sit on the Earth's atmosphere and bat at rainbow colored galaxies, then so can I!
ReplyDeleteKittens and rainbows and sparkles, oh my!
ReplyDeleteRest assured, we will intervene.
Ink: Agreed, screw triangles.
ReplyDeleteProf-like: That's beautiful man. I may have to email that kitten pic and your inspirational words to everyone in my address book.
Clio: Thanks. (BTW, do you know how to bedazzle a blog? I want to add some more sparkle...and maybe some new age music...)
I know how to bedazzle your blog--apparently Jennifer Love Hewitt was recently bedazzling things while Jamie Kennedy was selling books .
ReplyDeleteSo you have to find Jennifer Love Hewitt, obviously.
Ooooh, I bet she could whisper to ghosts and help me bedazzle!
ReplyDeleteIndeed! It's a win/win...
ReplyDelete