Monday, May 25, 2009

Intervention

I will just to have to trust all of you to notify me immediately if you see me engaging in the following behaviors:

1. I don a leather motorcycle jacket paired with a bathing suit and attempt to go waterskiing.
2. I hire a cute and adorable 6 year old guest blogger named Dr. Bowl-cut to join my posts.
3. I replace herkies with “the pike” and expect no one to notice.
4. I pick up Acadamnit and move it from Ivory Tower, University Town to Minneapolis under a highly dubious work-related guise.
5. I finally decide to have wild and passionate sex with my blog colleagues.
6. Popular Acadamnit characters, such as…uhm, monkeys, Deans and Reply-Allers, leave the blog in favor of more lucrative movie careers.

If I jump the shark in any of these conventional methods, an intervention will be required. While I no doubt have a shark to jump (coincidentally I saw fucking sharks on vacation- they were close, it was awesome), I will try to jump it gracefully. Preferably, I’ll make this jump with a cocktail in my hand a few good books under my belt, and stream of publications trailing behind me. We shall see.
(Can you believe that fucking kitten poster? I almost pissed myself.)

7 comments:

  1. Ok, we'll be on the lookout. Especially because "pike" is not as fun to say as "herky," nor does it have the same sense of giddyness. It's just all "hey, I'm a triangle."

    Nice kitty poster! ;)

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  2. That's the same kitten poster I have on my office wall. It gives me inspiration when I'm down and makes me think that if a ginormous kitten can sit on the Earth's atmosphere and bat at rainbow colored galaxies, then so can I!

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  3. Kittens and rainbows and sparkles, oh my!

    Rest assured, we will intervene.

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  4. Ink: Agreed, screw triangles.

    Prof-like: That's beautiful man. I may have to email that kitten pic and your inspirational words to everyone in my address book.

    Clio: Thanks. (BTW, do you know how to bedazzle a blog? I want to add some more sparkle...and maybe some new age music...)

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  5. I know how to bedazzle your blog--apparently Jennifer Love Hewitt was recently bedazzling things while Jamie Kennedy was selling books .

    So you have to find Jennifer Love Hewitt, obviously.

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  6. Ooooh, I bet she could whisper to ghosts and help me bedazzle!

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  7. Indeed! It's a win/win...

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