Thursday, December 31, 2009

Hibernation

It’s time for me to take a blogging hiatus, time to crawl into the deepest recesses of the sabbatical cave. Perhaps my skin will turn white, my body larval, a thick coating of slime will develop, and my eyes will become useless. Wait. That would be disgusting. Perhaps I will see only shadows and come to believe that these shadowy projections are real. Well, that would just be cliché. I think I have a pretty firm grip on the whole shadow creation business. Maybe I could discover some rare mineral that through endless montages of “science” and physical conditioning would result in me transforming into some type of superhero. Also unlikely, I hate working out and such things always seem to require one to wear goggles— which look uncomfortable. I could befriend some sabbatical cave creatures. You know, become some Dr. Doolittle type but I think that would piss off my dog.

A more likely scenario is that I will just crawl in and see what happens. Like all hibernating things I imagine I will emerge just as my fat stores are running out or because the right buttons have been pushed. Until then, wear your tweeds with pride and get trashed tonight.

10 comments:

  1. Have fun in the saBATtical cave. For what it's worth, I think a cape would go really well with the goggles, should you go that route. Best of luck. Will be right here with a congratulatory bag of Cheetos when you burst forth with news of your adventures and discoveries!

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  2. Goggles *do* look uncomfortable. But the skin depressions they leave look terrific after your day of superheroing is through...nothing says competent savior of all things righteous like circumocular divots.

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  3. I love the phrase "circumocular divots." And best of the luck in the cave. Although I recommend you avoid morphing into a termite queen. Have you seen one of those? Ew.

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