Thursday, December 31, 2009

Hibernation

It’s time for me to take a blogging hiatus, time to crawl into the deepest recesses of the sabbatical cave. Perhaps my skin will turn white, my body larval, a thick coating of slime will develop, and my eyes will become useless. Wait. That would be disgusting. Perhaps I will see only shadows and come to believe that these shadowy projections are real. Well, that would just be cliché. I think I have a pretty firm grip on the whole shadow creation business. Maybe I could discover some rare mineral that through endless montages of “science” and physical conditioning would result in me transforming into some type of superhero. Also unlikely, I hate working out and such things always seem to require one to wear goggles— which look uncomfortable. I could befriend some sabbatical cave creatures. You know, become some Dr. Doolittle type but I think that would piss off my dog.

A more likely scenario is that I will just crawl in and see what happens. Like all hibernating things I imagine I will emerge just as my fat stores are running out or because the right buttons have been pushed. Until then, wear your tweeds with pride and get trashed tonight.

9 comments:

  1. Have fun in the saBATtical cave. For what it's worth, I think a cape would go really well with the goggles, should you go that route. Best of luck. Will be right here with a congratulatory bag of Cheetos when you burst forth with news of your adventures and discoveries!

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  2. Goggles *do* look uncomfortable. But the skin depressions they leave look terrific after your day of superheroing is through...nothing says competent savior of all things righteous like circumocular divots.

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  3. I love the phrase "circumocular divots." And best of the luck in the cave. Although I recommend you avoid morphing into a termite queen. Have you seen one of those? Ew.

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