Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The Jingle of a Dog’s Collar Would Be Fine

C’mon Park Service. Do you really want my dog stuck in the car? She would like to see some geothermal points of interest too. And she wants to go for a walk, a real walk, not one where the car remains in sight. C’mon, she’s a good girl! What could my dog do that is worst than anything a human could do? (And don’t answer “dog doo” like you are being all clever or something, she doesn’t use toilet paper, the shit will be gone in no time) You really want my dog to just not see any of the cool stuff and hang out in my car? That shit is wrong.

(P.S. Smokey the Bear, you’re an embarrassment to the world of Ursids. Take the fucking pants off. I know some Park Service design team couldn’t decide how to portray your genitals…but you’re a fucking bear, step up to the plate and act like one by showing some junk.)

13 comments:

  1. Smokey the Bear, like GayProf, is from New Mexico. And I love dogs. Not sayin', just sayin'.

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  2. GayProf I just read about your kitty, such a tough situation...hope you two are alright.

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  3. Read Death in Yellowstone. It has numerous examples of why dogs shouldn't walk around geothermal hot-spots.

    I love dogs. I do not want to watch mine (or yours) boil alive.

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  4. Argh! I'm a dog owner too and it totally chaps my hide that I can't take him hiking in national parks now.

    I know why - it isn't dog doo.

    It's all the irresponsible dog owners who want to let them off their leash to run crashing through fragile ecosystems and terrorizing the local wildlife (including other tourists and their dogs). I love to see my dog run free as much as the next person, but I also respect signs that say "stay on the trail." DangerDog doesn't read very well, so he stays on his leash and I read for him. Too many other people out there think their dogs can read, so they let them off their leashes and ruined it for the rest of us. Boo!

    It sucks that your dog can't see the geysers now. :(

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  5. Dogs don't screw things up, people do. So if snowmobiles are allowed, why the hell not dogs????

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  6. I'm with you Belle. If I put pants on my dog maybe she could pass for Smokey...

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  7. The amount of acid rain, logging, dumping, destruction, road building, dam construction, etc etc etc no where near comes close to the degradation from pets or visitors to parks. The government *permits* environmental destruction, as long as it's paid for by industry. If pets could shit hundred dollar bills instead of fertilizer droppings, believe me, pets would have their own fucking monuments bigger than the geysers. Welcome to Kentucky, the National Park of Skippy. jc

    Gay Prof, so sad about your kitty. Hang in there.

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  8. Drove around Tahoe for three hours looking for a place my dog's paws could touch the soil. No such luck. Since when did the hate for dogs explode? Couldn't wait to get back to Orange County and Dog beach, where dogs are allowed to be.... dogs.

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  9. You just need to come east. Acadia National park still lets you hike with your dog, so long as your pup is on a leash, on most of the trails. And most of the trails that bar dogs are where you really wouldn't want to take your dog, unless of course your dog is good at climbing ladder rungs on the side of a cliff. Heck, if you come in the off season you can even take 'em on the beach.

    Disclaimer: I do live in Maine near Acadia but no I'm not getting a kick back from the tourism industry.

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  10. I wish I could get irate with you, but I have never owned a dog and I feel quite uneasy about domestic animals in general (after growing up with a very odd cat). I am going to try to change this once I have a house of my own. Not sure which animal to kick-start my new approach to human-animal co-habitation. Feel vomity when I pick up guinea pigs and any nervy fur-ball creatures (rabbits, mice etc). Any tips?

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  11. I don't know Hopeful...I never had a pet either, and as a kid I was a little scared of dogs (the Cujo movie scared the shit out of me), but then I became a dog parent...after a few awkward days I was in love.

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  12. We always used to take our dog camping with us (which was great except for the sharing a tent part, given that she always thought the sleeping bags were giant dog beds and inevitably crushed us). Now she's unwelcome in the parks? Well, harrumph.

    Though the book J. Harker suggests is scary (I read that too, J. -- high five!)

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