1. Restock the liquor cabinet. Who drank the nasty stuff in the back anyway?2. Search the internet for Cheetoh themed kitchen towels. I love the kitchen makeover, but a few extra touches are needed. Perhaps chickens or bunny rabbits munching on cheetohs, or Chester surrounded by a cornucopia of vegetables would be nice. Yes, a wallpaper border with matching towels and curtains would really finish off the look.
3. Visit a tailor. For some reason all my tweeds are fitting me strangely. Weird, did somebody play dress-up?
4. Wash the sheets. (If anyone is missing a zebra print rhinestone bedazzled thong, I found it.)
5. Find a better hiding place for my stash. (uhm, that thing you found, it’s just a jelly-bean holder I swear)
6. Search the blogosphere for a few missing items. My copy of “Freedom Rock” appears to be missing, a couple pairs of underwear, and half a case of Cheetohs…I’m sure they are around here somewhere…
The plants do appear to have been watered…and beer is good for lawns right? Anyone have a deposit out on this keg?
I don't know about how good beer is for lawns, but I'll bet you no longer have a slug problem in your garden!
ReplyDeleteThere was a half of case of Cheetos left? Oh, man, how did we miss those?
ReplyDelete(And I so hope you bedazzle your Cheetos towels and curtains!)
ps: How was the yammerfest? Hope it was smashingly great!
ReplyDeleteUh, my thong, please....
ReplyDeleteI can't find my party jeans, so they might be in the basement. Oh, and the liver in the sink... could you put it on ice and ship it my way when you get a chance?
ReplyDeleteThat car on the street in front of your house? It's mine. I have no idea where the keys are, and I'm not sure how I got back to my blog, but, um, I'll pick up the car as soon as I can. And why are my finger SO orange?
ReplyDeleteClio: You mean my slug farm? Shit. I thought they were just out cruising the neighbors lawn...
ReplyDeleteAmbivalent: I'll hold onto the keg if you don't mind. It's kinda skunky, but what the hell.
Ink: Yammerfest was typical, too exhausted to think about it! (boring nametag situation)
Annieem: I'll just assume the matching bra is yours too...I won't even ask how they came to rest where I found them. Do we need to have "the talk" about protection?
Prof-like: I'll get that shipped right away, you want the beer funnel I found next to it?
Good Enough: You can take the Blogtrain (A-line) over to the corner, bunch a fliers on your windshield, but car looks fine (there is a single shoe on the ground next to a puke puddle on the drivers side, you need that shoe?)
I have a bit of a tweed fetish, I can't lie. Then I danced around singing 'Business Time'. This might have been after knocking out the back of the liquor cabinet. Or maybe before snorting the cheeto dust. Can't recall.
ReplyDeletemustt hhave druunk bacck sttuff nott fllngg sgud...
ReplyDeleteHermitage, can you go check on Anon? And see if they are missing a shoe...
ReplyDeleteDr. No: Yeah. I went home barefoot, so that definitely could be my shoe. Is it a black suede ankle boot a la Madonna in the Lucky Star video? If so, that's mine. But since I don't have the mate for it, and the suede is probably ruined from puke, just toss it.
ReplyDeleteHey GEW, can I keep the awesome ankle bracelet on the Madonna boot? The gold heart and all the star charms are totally worth keeping! I'll have to extract it with some salad tongs...
ReplyDeleteYay! You're back.
ReplyDeleteYou can keep the funnel, I have an undergrad in my lab for the summer and they are mass producing them with materials bought off my start-up. If you find a holster belt with empty tequila bottles instead of guns and shot glasses instead of bullets, I'll want that back.
ReplyDeleteJust so you know, every time I look at that picture of John Belushi, it makes me smile. Thanks for posting it.
ReplyDeleteMe too Ink, he looks so happy!
ReplyDelete